For me, I have lost a friend... I have received innumerable messages from others who felt he was their mentor, and extraordinary influence, a guidance in their lives…
Now is the time to remind ourselves that for all the accolades and honours and universal recognition my dearest friend received, he was, Elaine, first and foremost your husband,. He relied on you totally. You gave each other unconditional love but at the same time, Elaine, you were his rock, his guard, his shield, his protector. And although he’s been cruelly taken from you so early when we all needed his inspiration for the years ahead, if not for you, who knows if he would have completed even the traditional lifespan of three score years and ten.
And all of those distinctions and awards and prizes meant as nothing to the love he had for you. And although, children, unable to spend as much time with you, he spoke frequently to me of his pride in your achievements that you each independently forged your own paths, which is something so difficult to do when having a father of such fame and reverence.
Now I want to say a few words to my chaver (friend). Do you remember when we first met? Bnai Akiva shabbat afternoons, Finchley Central synagogue…. I was your madrich, you were my chanich, how those roles were reversed in real life.
In those days, you were never the leader of the pack. You were quiet, you were reticent to speak. And we lost touch.
But from Jerusalem where we went to live I followed your upward path as a rabbi, never knowing that one day we would work together. Yet in 1988 we linked up again when I became chazzan at Marble Arch, … and those two years became ten because of you. Not just the power of your intellect, but the warmth of your and Elaine's friendship, the support you gave me in my music, encouraging me to write for the time in which we lived and not to hark back to the Olivahashalom days. You became the Shabbaton Choir’s patron. You agreed to accompany us around the world to raise funds for schools and institutions as well as inviting us to join you at those so-well-documents events of which you’ve spoken all over the world. Windsor Castle, Lambeth Palace, and at the Templeton Prize awards and so many more. And when I asked you, too often, you still said yes. And it was Elaine who pleaded with you on occasion to say no., and she was right.
One quick story. We’re in Beverly Hills, and on Shabbat we’re invited to the Beth Jacobs synagogue… you to give the address, the choir and me and shimon and jonny to daven. Shacharit begins at 9 o'clock. At 9.15 we hear pounding on the doors. Let us in! LET US IN! The fire marshalls, as they are called, shout no Room! Because in 15 minutes, all 600 seats had been taken. Rabbi SAcks was in town!
And that, dear chaver, was the story everywhere you went in the world.
How many years did you stand with us, inspiring us in your pre-Selichot address, then singing all the melodies with us with such kavanah. How blessed are we to have videos… for posterity. And everywhere, every year you were with us, Marble Arch for the Yamim Noraim… our sin-in-law crying with us last night with all our children reminded us that every year when the time came for your dvar torah would sit with us together, close up to you, and at certain moments we’d all look at each other thinking, this is history in the making! How privileged we all are! And how at Yom Kippur Neilah which you led, with me at your side, the choir around, all my grandchildren crowding on the bimah, and you putting your arm around them, and they looking up at you... Jonathan, they will always carry those memories with them. And although my story may be more personal, it’s how related you were to all the children you met. Your gentleness, your love shining through.
And finally, how much the four of us enjoyed our short summer vacations together. …we spoke about everything and anything. Never in all those years did I hear any comment which could be construed as lashon hara. You stayed true to your teaching, true to your Bible.
In 1991, on Desert Island Discs, you chose the Chabad song, tzama lecha nafshi as the disc you would take with you to the island if only one song was allowed. Tzama lecha nafshi - My soul thirsts for you, my body longs for you in the dry and weary waterless lands. And you said to the presenter when that happens, I would like that to be my epitaph. Tzama lecha nafshi.
It will always be with me wherever I go. Your teaching, your friendship, your inspiration.
